The Name Game

/ January 11, 2012/ damn you internet, Road Trip Wednesday, self-gratifying amusement/ 8 comments

Every Wednesday, YA Highway asks their readership a simple question to answer on your blog. Once you answer, you link your blog in the comments for other readers to hop on board. This is Road Trip Wednesday.

Today’s topic: If you couldn’t use your own name, what would your pseudonym or penname be?

Well.

I’ve been with my name for several undisclosed years. I’ve finally accepted that I don’t have a glamorous first name and that I do have a last name that trips up telemarketers*. Not to mention my middle name of Marie must be the most common middle name in my graduating class**.

There has to be a good reason why I’m going to write under an assumed name. I can only think of two that would be acceptable: I undertake erotica writing or I’m under the witness protection plan. In the bizarre case of either of these things happening, I guess I should be prepared…

…By using formulas found on the internet!

Soap Opera Name: Marie Waverley
Porn Name: Norbert Paul
Hillbilly Name: Dolly Walker
Glamrock Name: Charmaine Satellites
Elven Name: Avarhiriel
Hobbit Name: Marigold Underhill from Bywater
Dwarven Name: Thráin Skyanvil
Orkish Name: Púshrót the Ripper 
Star Wars Name: Aligre Ruwat***

So when the need arises, I think I’ll write under my Orkish name. It makes me rather badass, yes?



* Combine that with the added married name and not only do I own monopoloy in vowels, but I can sense a telemarketer miles and miles away.
** Coincidentally, it’s also the first name of all of my dad’s sisters. Yeah, you read that right–ALL OF THEM.
*** There is a honorary name as well, but that was too hard for my brain to handle today. Figure out yours here.
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Last.fm hit of the day: Flying by Anathema

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8 Comments

  1. Soap opera name – I need to try that one out! Wow, do all your dad's sisters go by Marie??? It is the middle name of one of my childhood besties.

  2. Your dwarven name does have a nice ring to it. You may want to concider changing your name after all.

  3. "Porn star Norbert Paul…"?? Hmmm… I think if I were a porn start and my name was Norbert Paul, I'd want to change it. 🙂

    So how do you pronounce your last name? I would guess at Greg-wahr, assuming French origin, and that a French pronunciation has persisted. But I'd like to know for sure. 🙂

  4. Well, Ms. Satellites, these are all awesome.
    The porn name is cracking me up, especially. I agree that the orkish name kicks all the other names' as*es.

  5. I'm tickled by the orkish name. Name generators always amuse me.

  6. I'm a big fan of Púshrót the Ripper. I think that if you and I ever get anything going on our co-authored piece we should publish under our Orkish names. Though we may wish to consider switching genres …

  7. Dolly Walker cracked me up for some reason. My Hobbit names were: Menegilda Puddifoot and Pandora Grubb (there was one with the surname Longhole, but I didn't like that one…). My Star Wars name is Moral Jarow, which is sorta sweet. But it sounds a little Jar Jar Binks-y (eek). This is all a little too much fun =)

  8. I love your take on this! Awesome…and I'm def. gonna go find out what my names are 😀 I personally love your Hobbit name the most!

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